"Seven bums and fourteen legs,
a brazen ecstasy which begs
the question some of us are asking -
is Peter Goulding multi-tasking?"

Martin Parker, Editor, Lighten Up Online

Friday, December 17, 2010

Riding the astral poetry bus

Following last week's pitiful attempt to board the Poetry Bus, in which I made three attempts to write a serious poem about a woman kneeling down in the water and begetting life (sorry Titus!) I am determined to purchase a viable ticket for this week's journey, being driven with great metaphorical skill by the lovely Weaver
Weaver's prompt is probably the shortest on record - STAR. Interpret how you will.
This is my offering...

Malfunction

Akureyri was awoken
by the one word, harshly spoken.
“Malfunction!” the robotic voice repeated.
She jumped up on all four legs,
like an Onkur smashing eggs,
her glist’ning brain cell nearly overheated.

She hit the button without thinking,
her great eyelid wildly blinking
and the siren echoed all throughout the station.
“Sector Five!” she called out tersely
as the red lights flashed perversely,
“An imminent escape of radiation!”

Through the door The Chief came tumbling,
half awake and loudly grumbling,
“What’s the damage?” she demanded, stern and prickly.
“Robot cargo ship,” responded
Akureyri. “Sector One did
all the checks before it left,” she went on quickly.

“Hyperspace has been suspended,”
said The Chief. “This can’t be mended.
There’s going to be a big explosion shortly.
That vesuvium consignment
must have shifted its alignment.”
Suddenly she looked quite old and portly.

There was nothing they could do
except sit back and watch the view,
and presently the monitor flashed brightly.
“That’s a Magnitude Fifteen,”
declared The Chief, her face quite green.
“Just like your brain?” quipped Akureyri lightly.

And they watched as that great ship
dimmed to just a giant blip,
continuing its journey through the sector.
“Better wait a week or two,”
said The Chief, “and then will you
arrange for a transporter to collect ‘er?”

On a planet with one moon,
in a desert, ‘pon a dune,
there sat a king, with wisdom long anointed.
And he watched that flash of light
burning brightly through the night,
and he called to his two fellow kings and pointed.

13 comments:

  1. Glad it is hyperspace that has been suspended rather than cyberspace! Love it Peter. I keep trying to get your sit on my blog list with little success - I shall try again right now. I am not into science fiction at all but you set the scene very nicely.

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  2. Out of this world ~ terrific!

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  3. Very nice - I love the explanation of the star of the east. That's the phrase running
    through my head & until I get it out of there I don't think I'll be able to
    write a ticket. I am NOT in a star of the east frame of mind these days!

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  4. You made me laugh out loud, Peter! It takes a lot to accomplish that. I loved the sci-fi stuff and one-eyed brain cell with four legs. You're very clever.

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  5. I did not see that ending coming! Great one!

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  6. Good take and funny! really enjoyed the end
    it flows really well, Thanks!

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  7. Out of this world!
    I enjoyed reading
    as the tale unfurled
    hard to pick a best bit because
    Rhyme of the week for me was

    'That vesuvium consignment
    must have shifted its alignment.'

    But the bit I liked best,
    my friend,
    was the unexpected twist
    at the end.

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  8. Peter, that is so great! This verse is utterly masterful;

    Through the door The Chief came tumbling,
    half awake and loudly grumbling,
    “What’s the damage?” she demanded, stern and prickly.
    “Robot cargo ship,” responded
    Akureyri. “Sector One did
    all the checks before it left,” she went on quickly.

    and you know what's best? I didn't guess the ending! Nice one.

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  9. Sometimes one word is enough. FANTASTIC!

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  10. Brilliant - love the punchline last verse, but especially the names, and the idea of that alien with one eye suddenly looking old and portly!
    Great

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  11. Many thanks to all for your kind comments.
    TFE - you rhyming now? Unclean! Unclean!
    Niamh - I've always felt that just because something is science fiction, it doesn't mean characters have to be one-dimensional and emotionless.
    Bug - is that a Billy Joel song?

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  12. This has to be the quirkiest ticket ever! LOL

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