Chile 1 Honduras 0 (Group H)
Whilst others, in ornate costume,
Retraced the steps of Leopold Bloom,
I sat down in a darkened room
To watch Honduras – Chile.
They promised us a cavalcade
Of goals – we wouldn’t be dismayed.
I munched upon a sandwich made
Of cheese and piccalilly.
But though the Chileans liked to pass,
The final ball too oft lacked class.
Although moves started well, alas,
They all became too frilly.
The hapless Seychelles referee
Did not allow the play run free,
Blew for every fall and he
Gave cards out willy-nilly.
First blood to the team in red.
Now the goals will come, they said.
Poncé stooped down low to head
And looked extremely silly.
Sadly things did not get better,
Chile lacked a real goal-getter.
Disgruntled, I got up to get a
Large wedge of Caerphilly.
Spain 0 Switzerland 1 (Group H)
There wasn’t much expected from the Swiss,
(I mentioned to my elder brother, Chris)
Their play is dull,
Predictable,
They set their stall
Behind the ball
And keep men back
While in attack.
In Jukebox Jury terms, they’d be a miss.
There wasn’t much expected from the Swiss.
Spain deserved to go down to the Swiss
For squand’ring opportunities like this.
They’re full of guile,
They’ve flair and style,
Each measured pass
Across the grass
Is slick and brisk
And takes a risk
But where’s the final ball that brings such bliss?
Yes, Spain deserved to go down to the Swiss.
Nobody gave tuppence for the Swiss
Or thought they’d show a metamorphosis.
We thought they’d play
‘Gainst Spain and pray
They’d get a snore-
Filled goalless draw.
We’d not reproach
Their poor paid coach
For tactics that
Make champagne flat.
No, they did not deserve our Judas kiss,
Though nobody gave tuppence for the Swiss.
Whilst others, in ornate costume,
Retraced the steps of Leopold Bloom,
I sat down in a darkened room
To watch Honduras – Chile.
They promised us a cavalcade
Of goals – we wouldn’t be dismayed.
I munched upon a sandwich made
Of cheese and piccalilly.
But though the Chileans liked to pass,
The final ball too oft lacked class.
Although moves started well, alas,
They all became too frilly.
The hapless Seychelles referee
Did not allow the play run free,
Blew for every fall and he
Gave cards out willy-nilly.
First blood to the team in red.
Now the goals will come, they said.
Poncé stooped down low to head
And looked extremely silly.
Sadly things did not get better,
Chile lacked a real goal-getter.
Disgruntled, I got up to get a
Large wedge of Caerphilly.
Spain 0 Switzerland 1 (Group H)
There wasn’t much expected from the Swiss,
(I mentioned to my elder brother, Chris)
Their play is dull,
Predictable,
They set their stall
Behind the ball
And keep men back
While in attack.
In Jukebox Jury terms, they’d be a miss.
There wasn’t much expected from the Swiss.
Spain deserved to go down to the Swiss
For squand’ring opportunities like this.
They’re full of guile,
They’ve flair and style,
Each measured pass
Across the grass
Is slick and brisk
And takes a risk
But where’s the final ball that brings such bliss?
Yes, Spain deserved to go down to the Swiss.
Nobody gave tuppence for the Swiss
Or thought they’d show a metamorphosis.
We thought they’d play
‘Gainst Spain and pray
They’d get a snore-
Filled goalless draw.
We’d not reproach
Their poor paid coach
For tactics that
Make champagne flat.
No, they did not deserve our Judas kiss,
Though nobody gave tuppence for the Swiss.
South Africa 0 Uruguay 3 (Group A)
With twenty minutes left, they started leaving.
Two goals down, the die was cast, they reckoned.
Entertaining no hopes of retrieving
A goal and maybe pushing for a second.
Forlan in attack was free and fecund.
Too early did the so-called fans start grieving.
As failure to get past the group stage beckoned,
With twenty minutes left they started leaving.
With twenty minutes left, they started leaving.
Two goals down, the die was cast, they reckoned.
Entertaining no hopes of retrieving
A goal and maybe pushing for a second.
Forlan in attack was free and fecund.
Too early did the so-called fans start grieving.
As failure to get past the group stage beckoned,
With twenty minutes left they started leaving.
aww - the third one makes me sad... do keep these up - it's the best way for me to stay in touch with what's happening.
ReplyDeleteThanks
Your mom must be cheering in heaven (along with soccer-fan JP II perhaps) for her Swiss; they certainly surprised us all, didn't they? Pundits DID say to expect upsets, but that was totally unexpected.
ReplyDeleteKevin says, "Can you point out Uruguay on a map?" I say, "I think I can get close." (Geography wasn't really my subject.)
Kat
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Hi Niamh, I think I was angry more than sad. You're hosting the World Cup and don't get behind your team when they go behind?
ReplyDeleteHi Kat, my mam was of the "22 eejits kicking va ball about" variety but all the cousins would have been cheering like mad. General Franco, Pablo Picasso, Don Quixote, your boys took one hell of a beating...
I can do South American geography quite well but I'm quite vague on West Africa!
I'm just agog at reports of the Swiss celebrations back home.
ReplyDelete"Businessmen and women in Berne and Zurich left their offices early for a celebratory drink."
Lord help us if they win.