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Sunday, May 30, 2010

Standing on the footpath as the Poetry Bus departs

This week's task set by Bill has me beaten I'm afraid.
Take a sentence, remove the second half, think up alternate endings and make a poem out of them.
This is my workings (like maths exams, I'm hoping not very optimistically to gain a bonus point for showing my reasoning)
Sentence - There's a guy works down the chip shop / swears he's Elvis
There's a guy works down the chip shop / who got done for assault and battery / who has no sole / who has a sense of plaice / who can sprinkle me with vinegar any time he likes / who's a little ray of sunshine / who wears a herring aid / who double jobs as our local TD.

Its actually quite a useful exercise because I'm intrigued why I can't do it.

Some theories - I've written about 6,000 words and 2 poems over the last three days and I'm all written out; the phrases don't lend themselves to a rhyming poem; the phrases don't lend themselves to a serious poem in free verse; the phrases point towards a bad fish pun poem and I feel the object of the exercise is to get away from the original sentence.

Whatever. All I can do is point people towards Bill's blog where they can be linked to more imaginative poets than me!

9 comments:

  1. I found it tough as well, not sure but think I have one after several attempts that will hopefully be a poem by the deadline - ie tomorrow. Anyway 6000 words and two poems is pretty super going for 3 days work, busy busy!!

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  2. I'm having a tough time as well. I've got some notes on my laptop and few lines I like, but so far, nothing I'd be anxious to post. A sneaky migraine isn't helping. (Or is it perhaps the result?)
    Love that "herring" aid line!

    Kat

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  3. No, I've had a few attempts but I think that the prompt is not good for us rhymers, unless you deliberately choose second halves that rhyme.
    Niamh, you came up with a stunner - I'm envious.
    Kat - hate them sneaky migraines!

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  4. And what is wrong with a fish pun poem? I like it...more fish! More fish!
    x

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  5. Plus I love rhyming but no way I could do it every poem! It's worth learning to enjoy doing both I think.
    x

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  6. it was a hard one to fin'ish alright! Don't f'eel too bad... (sorry.. )

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  7. Pete, this is as good as mine! I couldn't do it either, I think because I left myself with the need for a verb in the half-sentence. Have noticed that if you went with an "and" to add onto maybe things flowed more.
    And Rachel's right, more fish pun poems! More fish!

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  8. Up with fish! Let's not forget that one in the aquarium.

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  9. I think you were onto something there! At the same time, I almost didn't get on the bus this week because I had such difficulty with this one.

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