"Seven bums and fourteen legs,
a brazen ecstasy which begs
the question some of us are asking -
is Peter Goulding multi-tasking?"

Martin Parker, Editor, Lighten Up Online

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

That milk jug made of pewter

Okay, here's my effort for Willow's pictorial prompt. World, be amazed.

There are vases that are prettier
And teapots that are cuter,
But something kind of struck me
‘Bout that milk jug made of pewter.
It was sleek, it was curvaceous
And its fine embossed relief
Made me wonder ‘bout the provenance
Behind that laurel leaf.

I flew down to the library
As fast as I could scooter
To see what I could find out on
The library computer.
But, though I spent an age, I couldn’t
Find out what’s the beef
With that grey, bewitching milk jug
And it’s stamp of laurel leaf.

Perhaps it was a birthday gift
To some girl from her suitor?
A thank-you from a graduate
To his despairing tutor?
I marvelled at the mystery
Contained in that relief
On the side of that grey milk jug
In it’s wreath of laurel leaf.

I know I should have sold it,
If I’d been a bit astuter.
I really had no answer to
That scheming prosecutor.
For now I sit here in this cell,
A sad career thief
Betrayed by one small fingerprint
Upon that laurel leaf.


  1. Bravo! Very charming, Pete. I love the delightful rhyming pattern. And that last line is perfect.

    You're a tad early! Be sure to post it again on the 16th, so all the participants who signed up on Mr. Linky can enjoy it, as well! xx

  2. Ah, what a gobshyte! I just saw Tuesday and assumed it was the following Tuesday.
    No wonder I don't win any competitions.

  3. I love the repetition of the laurel leaf, but I am truly astounded at how many rhymes you managed to eak out of "cuter". Bravo!
    I once went to a bar dressed up as a Roaring 20s flapper, only to find the costume night was not until the following week, so don't feel bad.


  4. Can you change that to "eke"? I knew there was something not right about it.

  5. Thanks Kat,
    I don't think I can change it. I've tried but can't figure out how.
    Still "eak" is a great word. Its about time it took its rightful place in the dictionary.

  6. Peter, I just got your book in my mailbox and am enjoying poring through it. I cracked The First Noel and loved it!
    I think I'll enjoy the rest.

    Put an image on my blog with a link to you in the hope that someone else will bite.



    P.S. Acknowledgement to Father Ted was great!

  7. Hi Kat,
    That's very decent of you! Many thanks.Hope you enjoy the rest of the book.
    Actually I'm surprised you got it so soon. Post often takes two weeks to go five miles down the road here, so that must be some kind or record!

  8. Peter,
    We're really enjoying your book. "Portaloo" was an instant favourite! Looking forward to reading it again and again. I hope the widget gets you a few sales.